Hey that is a great poem please email me all your poems at sweetie20luv@aol.com and rate my poems thanks.

Great twist at the end, the image of the broken mirror, and the person staring into it, seeing not the broken mirror but themselves . . broken. Wow!

I tried to stay strong
When you left me all alone
I soon realized I was weak
But you knew that all along

I think this stanza would be better if you swopped the first two lines

When you left me all alone
I tried to stay strong
I soon realized I was weak
But you knew that all along

The rhyme scheme would also work better then.

Peace. [Sole]

Lol awsome it was a great poem i enjoyed reading it alot i an relate ot it.

I liked the ending it was powerful and touching.

You had a good flow of rhymes apart from the first and fifth stanzas that weren't "real" rhymes.

Last line of the sixth stanza should be "cause of it..."

You had some very emotional lines in there, and as I've previously said you gave the poem a very strong ending.

I enjoyed the read.

Wow i really liked your poem it had like a special feeling to it like thats something some people for real go through!!

Thats really good i like it good job :)

The very last line was just out of this world. Every word heightened the sadness in this poem...and when it came down to it being about you that really teaked at my heartstrings....if a poem can do all this...it has to be good....

;)

[lostlaureate - come find me]

This poem is so awesomist!!! i really like it! well i really hope u get to feeling better! love ya bye!

I really liked this poem. You did a great job. I really liked the ending, mostly the last two lines... they had a really big impact along with the whole poem. Sort of relateable for me.

This is so good. its like really um... i dont know the word... like sad...? does that work? totally great job though.

That was awesome i really liked the ending great work

This poem is amazing.... I loved it... I can totally relate to it... I loved the ending to it... 5/5

I felt like you used the me/be rhyme too many times. If you only used it twice - at the start and end of the poem - then you could consider that part of the conclusion, but you used it three times. I felt like this poem was similar to some other poems of its type in that most of the poem was a sort of vague description of someone doing you wrong. There aren't really any specifics. I thought the imagery and symbolism of the broken mirror vs. the broken you was pretty well done.

Omg last stanza was amazing! actually...they all were. The rhyming was good but become and numb seemed a little forced. but thats ok cuz I really liked the meaning behind this poem. good job! I definately give it a 5/5!

Very nice. A lot of emotion and seems like a lot of time has been put into this.

I liked the last stanza alot. Great way to end it.

The tweaking must have paid off. I'm just reading it for the first time and thoroughly enjoyed. Keep writing!

Wow, This was really good. I loved how you twisted it at the end, Really good thinking!! Keep up the great work! 5/5

`natalie xx

"Letting myself fall
Into a flood of tears"
I loved that, it gave me the image of the character falling into a hole...and falling into their own sorrow, as if that created the hole in the 1st place
This was extrememly well written, and a cut aboce the other poems of this genre I have read for a while
The twist at the end was completely unexpected and I just loved it
Great stuff...keep writing :D

Wow.. this is definitly the best poem ive read in a long time i loved it i loved the way you worded it and the twist at the end excellent job keep it up 5/5

~!*FallenTears~!*
~!*Meaghen~!*

Well, you requested that this be the one I vote on. I think the most important advice I could give you on this one is to change the format. Since the lines are so short, and the format is only A,B,A,C you should peice the lines together and make less stanzas resulting in an A,A,B,B format. The poem itself was good, but try to keep the syllable count for each line fairly close. The beginning lines, and the ending lines have a different syllable count. I don't want to bring you down, I just want to help you get better. Thank you for your vote and your comment. It's very appreciated. Thank you.