Comments : Into thine Hands

  • 17 years ago

    by Clarissa

    I thought the poem was well put and thought out. I liked the way you wrote it with the language... i felt like i dont see poems like this often.
    -Clαяissα ♥

  • 17 years ago

    by Sean Allen

    "Secret—Why do thou haunt thee morning hours?"
    if you're doing old modern english (aka shakespearean) then i'd make do = dost, and I think 'thee' should be 'the'
    ~~~
    "Twas soul tears which trickled down fragile face.
    Cup mine face into thine hands pure heartbreak."
    I feel like t'was has an apostrophe.. but I could be wrong. I'd hypenate soul-tears, because it seems like a phrase. I think a 'your' should go in front of 'fragile' to make the sentence more grammatically correct. I'd avoid using the word 'face' twice so close together... maybe another descriptive noun.
    ~~~
    note: 'thee' means 'you'. If you're trying to say 'my', then that's just 'my', I'm pretty sure. Try checking out this link:
    http://www.cummingsstudyguides.net/xThou.html
    ~~~
    "Oh misery! Shall thy forever be under spells?"
    In this case 'thy' was supposed to mean 'you', but 'thy' means 'your'. I'd use 'thee'.