Stace -
Much thanks for your comment on my poem. Now for yours..
Honey, this, in a way, isn`t poetry. I think you should consider changing your grammar, not using numbers to represent words, and double checking your spelling. Then, I would put this in the quotes section.
But otherwise, I really liked the first two lines. Very common, I`ve heard it probably a billion times, but they`re two lines that hold a lot of emotion, which added a nice twist for your poem.

Samantha Hollywood