Nice one, i really enjoyed reading it, 5/5

Very creative, expressive poem. I liked your details.
The first stanza could be better, it sounded a bit plain and short.
You can also work on the flow. Keep it up

I like this poem a lot, even though it's kind morbid and sad! i really like the last two lines, 'the innocent killed by soldiers play. an unaware victim of a game gone too far' i like that u make it sound like a game gone wrong!

Wow....just wow. It's so great and depressing. But what makes it more depressing is that it's happening and there seems to be a veil created by the government hiding all the monstrosity, it's sad! But this poem is just great. The words couldn't be put better. Great write m'dear!
5/5
~Dana

Lovely poem. Very sad.

I thought the ending was excellent.

So she screams,
Her final scream,
As the bullet thuds into her heart.

The innocent killed by soldier's play.
An unawere victim of a game gone far too far.

^ Very morbid-like. ;]

Take Care,
N-G-C-S.

Wow. wow.

The last few lines really hit you.

this is amazing.