Wow...you have used some great words..

i didnt like the way your rhymes went but it fits with the poem, and thats what i do like...

october xx

Wow,wow, very good 5/5

Why I never seen my brother.
((Why I never see..
or
Why I have never seen..))

I liked this. It reminds me of the poems I used to write.. I think you should try to use more discription. Just a suggestion. Also, I loved the ending, it really pulled the poem together. Nicely written.

xDarkSuicidex 5.5

Wow, another great emotional poem, you have done a great job here as well, another 5/5 from me.

Brought a Tear to my eye, defiantly 5/5... Goodwork.

This poem was short and sweet. I liked it alot, and I'm very sorry that you have had to go through these hardships, good luck to you. 5/5

lots of love
*~*Becky*~*

Hey, well responding on that comment you gave me, yes its what you think it is and yes i know you cqant change the past but thats life and it got better even though threw all the pain. but its cool some my poems are bout you but life and past of feelings.. anyways, this poem is good, very interesting.5/5

Goth,

You really must pay more attention into the finesse of your poems. You have great plots which I feel you are not utilizing to your full capacity.the poem is good, but it couls have been great. The third stanza is really a stone in the cheese, you could have written something with more depth and expression,especially since all other of your stanzas are so. The poem is better without the third stanza at all. Your punctaution is good, but like others have said try to improve your vocabulary and rhyming.

I did not like the ending, it seemed very abrupt. You coul shave chosen a different way to express that though it hurts you to great extent you only intend good towards your mother, bu thten those lines may be part of your culture or custom and maybe those lines are exactly what you feel, so I cannot call it wrong; but I do not like it. Title is quite realtive.

I would also have like to see a couple of more stanzas in this poem. It has that depth.

Please do not be angry if you feel that I have not sympathized with you, even though you have mentioned that this is a true story. I am a person who tries to help people write better; not a person who helps a person to feel better. I only comment your poem; not your emotional depth.

Very sad and heart felt poem--- You put a lot of emotion into it... Good write; 5/5-----Keep it up!

Very awesome write. I cannot imagine what you've went through. but wish you all the best. 5/5

I love this. I've been going through the same thing. No matter how hard it has gotten for me though I've always remembered that people are in worse conditions than me. If you could sometime please look at "Daddy Please" thanks 5/5

~Shae

I have found that by writing about the things that are weighing on my heart and soul helps to ease the burden. So keep on writing, and telling your story. I thought it was great!

Wow. I could feel the emotion and tears in this poem as I read through it. Just amazed. You are a true talented poet. Great write. 5/5. ~Keep Up The Writing~

Great poem...great emotion loved it