As a whole I wasn't overly impressed, but that might have something to do with the fact that I'm not a huge lover of 'non-rhyming' poems. I did like certain parts though, especially the Bracketed lines.

Brad

P.S. Thank you for your comment on my poem 'The Evil in my Veins', it was and is always appreciated.

"I watch the sun rise
watch the birds fly"

[Sunrise is one word.. and take out the second watch and use 'and' or maybe, write. "the birds fly by"]

Just a thought.. nicely done. Probably not one of your best, but I'm sure you are a talented poet.