Nice poem......5/5

God bless u

This is very good joe, it has great flow and structure, i give it a 5/5!!! keep it up!!!

Great song.5/5 i think that it would make a great country song;)

Really good poem joe !!
i was listening to the killers~ inde rock and roll
while reading your poem and it really fit in (well the begining did)
rather good if i may say so !
5/5
me x x x x

Love the beat and the energy, it could really be a song. great controling metaphors and best of luck.

lissa

I like how the first line of all of your poems really sets the mood. Times a tickin--I imagined a clock ticking throughout the song, setting the beat. 5/5