I like this. When i read it i could feel your emotion and found it amazing... keep up the good work..

Hey i could really feel your emotion in this. and i liked how you narrated it too. it would make for good lyrics, i think. great job here!

Emmm**

Wow I loved the emotion within this poem, but there is way too much going on in it. the ( ) and the " " was just too much, also it wasn't really structured very well. The Flow was good. Other than that it was greatly written.

Peace, Joe