Comments : Forum for disaffected youth

  • 17 years ago

    by sibyllene

    Touche! really the only things i didn't like too much about this poem were 1. the rhyming of dead, bed, and head. i think you can do better. and 2. I think "f'uck" and its derivatives would be more effective if only used once. or, perhaps, three times. maybe i just don't like the two. nice write!