This poem has a very good flow to it. I enjoyed reading it, the depths was nice and it well depicted, you could picture it as if it was happening right in front of you. 5/5

It was really good, had a story to it and very imaginative. On this line:

"It gives her a since of pleasure "

Instead of 'since' it should be sense, I think thats the word you want to use. Great piece!!

I like this, but i feel as if in the end the flow was thrown off completley, but tahts not ahrd to fix.
(:
i really like the emotion you wrote in the poem, i can really feel it. zand the imagery- wow.
kaitlynx.

Very nice poem...
really deep...
i do feel related to it...
keep on writing

*isabel*

This is a sad one. the flow was great and very emotional. great job.

Hm.. I liked this one however I didnt get as into it as I did with the other two that you recomended I read. I think it had something to do with the randomness of the stanzas as well as the no rhyme scheme I think that if you were to fix that up a bit this would be a much better peice to read.

Good poem...in some way i felt like i could relate to it.i felt like i could see what was happening right in front of me.