Great Job! I liked it...very original!

This line:

"Tired find me a place to hide"

Put a comma(,) in between tired and find.

"Scared that there would be more of all the hurt and pain door"

I think you should take off the word door, dont get why its there.

"Trying to find her light,
but they keep hunting her saying nothat's not right"

I think you tried too hard to rhyme in these's two lines. They seemed forced. And put a space in between no and thats. Sorry if I sounded mean in my comments but I wasnt trying to be. I just give honest opinions. Keep it up!

I liked it i like all your poems good job keep it up~melissa~

ItS a finE piecE of worK, thaT thrilleD uS greatlY....

luzaN anD nazeeR