Comments : Won't You Stay Awake For Me?

  • 16 years ago

    by myshiningstar14

    Side-Note: THis poem is written because me nad bf are going through my ex,...he threatened ot hurt me and him so we're being escorted by police at school and what not so the "Tavern Barriers" are school and our houses. ANd I cry cause I wish I could be there to make sure he got home safely...bc theres a warrent out for my exs arrest and yeh. hope you all fele the emotion in this. thanxs for reading..pls leave your comments.

    Melissa

  • 16 years ago

    by Gem

    "My pink cored lips
    are dry,
    they miss
    the touch of your
    tender kiss."

    That was so beautiful..
    The whole poem was just such a gorgeous piece, the love was shining through.
    I hope things get better for you soon.
    5/5
    *Gem*

    (Yeah, in the sestina it was hard adding imagery when i was limited to six words =)

  • 16 years ago

    by Weeping Wolf

    Won't you stay?
    Won't you stay awake
    for me?
    Your fingertips
    that got me so caught
    in this,
    and the sunrise that
    captures me in your
    beauty which is
    like a massive war
    upon my soul.

    -My favorite stanza, especially the "your fingertips, that got me so caught in this" such a powerful, unique line. love it. I'm dying to read more...