Comments : Losing you will come so fast

  • 16 years ago

    by Tammie

    I like this because it is so simple, yet so true and it's short, but it gets to the point. The rhyming comes out nicely, as does the flow. The vocab suited the simplicity of the poem.

    The only thing that I stumbled with was the first two lines of the last stanza:
    'I wish you were here to stay
    But it never ends that way'

    I thought that it would flow better if it said:
    'I wish you were here to stay
    But it never seems to end that way'

    Just a thought. I can relate to this poem very well. It's good when you realise this and you don't get yourself in too deep. Well done though. =] 5/5

    Much love,
    Tammie

  • 16 years ago

    by Ashlie

    This is a good poem..if you love someone..u cant help how you feel..but if they dont love you, then u gotta find sumone who does and who apreciates you...your poem shows that you wont luv that person because your not sure..u shouldnt feel like that..but other than tha concept..its a great poem