Comments : A Dance with Misery....

  • 16 years ago

    by MyEscape

    Great poem! I just noticed one grammar error. You were talking about how you'd never sleep another night with that person with you, but you worded it wrong (or i just missed the pt. lol )

    I'll never sleep another night,
    Without you in my bed

    If you meant that they wouldn't sleep with you anymore than it should read

    I'll never sleep another night
    WITH you in my bed.

    Because when it's worded the other way, it actually means they WILL be there. Sorry...I know that must sound confusing! I just noticed it and I'm really sorry if I just read it wrong. But please know that I did enjoy your poem. Your flow and rhyme were excellent as was your message!
    *ME*

  • 16 years ago

    by babyPB

    I love this poem. 5/5