I know this poem here it is mine and it isn't to good...but still I had to get my emotions out

Now there is only commotion would make the poem flow better
In the first verse, you could say "I wanted my heart to sing"
it rhymes better with anything and is better grammar
if you want to test it out you could change the things I mentioned or anything you want
then read it aloud to yourself to see if it flows better
otherwise i love the poem
i may be wrong I just write what i think

Yea i see that now...but i was writing a sonnet and i was following the abab cdcd efef gg form...but i do like it how you said....