....Very well put. I'm adding this to my favorites as well. So far, I have 3 of you poems in my Favs.

Good poem. but in the second stanza, last two lines...*can't you see that its broken, cut and broken apart* I think you used the word broken too close together. if it were *can't you see that its broken; cut and torn apart* it would flow more easily

Amazin poem---5/5

Amazing. absolutely amazing. 5/5. I hope this isn't a reflection of what's really true...

Wow... this is amazing..
5/5... my fav stanza is.. (and i dont know why?)

Can't you see I need you to understand
Can't you see I am dying again
Can't you see I'm wanting to die
as planned?

Something about this one.. =]
xx

This is beautiful... and its scary how most of what we write in poems is a reflection of whats going on... and thats what scares everyone... needless to say, we feel how we feel right? we write with similarities, u should check some out, may help understand my point of view...

keep it up, u are talented...

I love ur poems there great

Wow.
It was veryy good.I am really impressed.I hope i could write such thing.You are really Creative,it seems you have very strong emotions.Really i dont have words to praise what i have read and juddged you from your writing.It is really verry good.
I am submitting my poems in this forrum and i need people like you to read them,give me suggestions and corrections,so that i can also improve my abilities.It will be very nice of you,if you please take out some time and read my few submitted poems.I would love to hear some possitive criticism from your side.
Love
Junaid