I like it, but then I don't.
If you wrote it in for like

shdoisadisdf
skjfhoisaghiras
hoisadghisdjf
soidhoisdf

Instead of paragraph form, it might
come together more easily.
Just a personal opinon.

You did a good job
=]
Nice work

I agree with tori
its hard to read when its all together
but i did read it and did like it
good work
xx