Brilliant!!!! You have a few bumps that you need to smooth out, but brilliant never the less. This was great work. Very creative and captivating. There is nothing more I can really say except smooth those bumps and you have yourself a masterpiece. Of course you already knew that didn't you Terra? Lol. Keep up the great work.
I love this, Terra . It was really well written by the both of you . Each stanza has very good imagery that is able to captivate a reader from the very first line of the poem and keep them interested until the last and even after the poem . I especially loved the first stanza, it stood out the most to me . Kudos to the both of you . <3