True love stories never have happy endings because true love never ends!

Dont give up!! Dont give in!! Dont be a loser!! Please try again!

A fish out of water is like a man in water!

I dont hate you because youre fat!
Youre fat because I hate you!!

Randomness makes the world go round!!

Why do we park in driveways
and drive in parkways??

There were two muffins in an oven,
one says to the other "man its hot in here!" the other replies "HOLY SHIT a talking muffin!"

You can always figure that youre just as far in as you will ever be out of trouble

My name when I was little was "no" but when I went to my grandmas house it was always "sweetie"

I may seem like I am under stress,
but do not worry it is only P.M.S.