Daddy once told me that when mommy passed away, she was taken by the butterflies into Heaven. From that day forward, I swore that I would torture and kill every last one of them until they would reveal to me the location of this so called 'Heaven.'

My dad wants me to be a carpenters dream, never been laid and flat as a board.

Im NOT wearing tight pants!!!!

Why are roses the symbol of love when roses always die? my sis told me its supposed to be fake roses but wouldnt that mean your love was fake?

Clowns are very scary people. seriously, think about, they always know when its your bday and they always were make-up, even when they are guys.

For the peoplez who keep putting, "i called your boyfriend guy and he hit me with his purse" its getting so old it has mold.

I'm in my own little world, It's OK, people know me here.

Do you know what sunglasses are for? The government says they're to protect your eyes from the sun, but I know the the truth, they're to protect you from the CIA, thats right the CIA. Just think abuot it next time you go outside.

"Oh My God! you're like a fricken' boomerang! I throw you away and you just keep coming back!"

This isnt mine, but its from Gilmore Girls:

Im going to makeout in the coatroom, dont eat my chicken.