For once, id like to break someones heart, instead of them breaking mine

What am i now but a sad song that reminds me of you. an empty shell disguised as a person. thats what i am now.

I know im amazing
but with no one here to tell me so
i dont believe it

I want to spend my time by the ocean this summer
to be at peace
but i also want to go back to the scene of the crime
to torture myself with the memory of you
to remind myself of where i went wrong
so i never do that again

I cannot picture your face in my mind
so if i saw you in a crowd
would i recognize you?

You live so far away
maybee it was just the distance, thats why you wouldnt stay
i was so hard to love
in my self-pitty, maybe you couldnt handle that
or maybe it was her all along

Knowing your with her makes me sick
but knowing if you lived here
and that you might be with me
makes me dream
when i wake up
your with her
and im in this shittwole

You are the light at the end of my tunnel

We talked that night
for the first time in a long time
and i knew things would never be okay
for i pushed you away
and ill never get you back
for i am the lonly
of which you know nothing of

Whats the point of my ceasless writing
if youll never see it