Christmas is just another apportant time in my life that your not here to share it with me

&& all I can say is no one will ever understand me the way you do

&& so tonight I will get drunk and you will finally be out of my head

Just like a snowman you build it you enjoy it and then it gets tired and melts, well thats how life is your happy then people keeps adding more and more and doesnt listens to u intell its to late

If they want to lie to me , that's fine it wont bother me i can lie to

I just cant understand how someone can leave there kid to fight this on there own

&& my friends told me the truth comes out when were drunk, well i found it out tonight that its really true , but y do i still love u?

& my best friend called me today, we made plans, i know he mite be the only person in my life that will never go away,he helps me with alot hes always there for me , im starting to really like him , then y am i so scared?

&& he held me last night & told me this relationship could work i said i dont think so I just cant take the chance of get hurt again

Im really starting to get close to him and care about him and im getting scared away