Have no idea what to do!

Here's my story... Its long but bare w me... Ok I've been married for almost 4 years June 18 would be 4 years when I met my man he was the one I knew I would spend the rest of my life w I just had a good vibe... Every thing was good then I've made a few mistakes in life like when my bf at the time befor I got married got mad when I wouldn't have sex w him but I believe in the saying sex after marriage and he was like well I shouldve gone back to Sara his ex so I threw the engagement ring and didn't talk to him for like 2 weeks and then he came back to me I took him back... I mean this is the man I talked on the phone for like 5 hours a wk before my wedding I don't even know why I did this but we got into an argument and he was throwing cds in the yard of his parents house so he was going crazy I went into my car and locked the doors I was scared and he was yelling at me unlock the f door I said no and he took off his shirt wrapped it around his fist and busted my windshield I ran inside his parents house and locked him outside now at the time I guess you can call me stupid but Idk why I didn't call the police I called my mom and I shouldve listened to her she told me she wants me to be happy but the dumbest thing I ever did was get married I can't say I regret meeting my husband cuz of my son he's 3 but its gotten worse he slapped my leg in may of 08 had a big hand print he's pushed me calls me names infront of my boy this devastates me I've told my parents bout all this and even gone to my sister my blood and they think to stay together for the kid its not bout that its about the kids safety my son already knows how to say shutup I can't take this I cry and try to be strong for my boy he even tries to comfort me I hate crying infront of my boy he's asking me mommy why you crying me wuv you I tried legal aide to try to get a lawyer for me but they couldn't help me cuz we own a house together and a car the other mistakes I made my family is not on my side only my friends I'm holding on by my friends its not fair to put my child through this I told my husband that I'm not happy w him anymore I don't even want a man right now he emotionally puts me down I'm trying so hard to find a place I paid 500 out of 1500 to my lawyer but I can't file separation till I'm away from him I'm ready to move on w my life but he won't let me I can't even go out w my friends cuz he's always calling my phone asking me who I'm w what time I'm going to be home its really none of his business who I talk to I'm just stuck in this hole I feel like I'm the problem I keep thinkn why did I get myself in this? Does anyone know any numbers or someone I could talk to? No man should ever lay a hand on a woman I shouldn't have gone back to him in 06 my life I know would be so much happier on my own I know it would be hard to be a single mom but I'd rather be a single mom and have my friends support me then to be physically and emotionally brought down I have a new poem no more I wrote to ease the tension I just need all the support I can get!!!

I would divorce him you deserve better than that no man has the right to touch a woman like that. i would pack my bags while hes at works and go to my mams house house or a friend or relative of any kind even if they need to pic you up so he cant place a stolen car report. he needs to stop treating you like that!!! you can def pm me about all this and i will for sure help you out the best i can girl

Well you definetely should not stay to together for the kid(s), what child wants to live in chaos and watch their parents hate one another?

"I can't even go out w my friends cuz he's always calling my phone asking me who I'm w what time I'm going to be home"

This kills me, why do you answer the phone? When a friend recently left her abusive bf and was staying with me she would do this and it drove me crazy.

Stay with a friends, go to a shelter, do whatever you have to do to get yourself out of the situation you are in. Do not talk to him, answer his calls, do all of your talking through a lawyer. And then take a look at yourself and figure out why you would have let yourself get into this kind of situation and don't let it happen again. Your child is a sponge, time to counteract the damage that has already been done.

Well my parents have enough at the house w my sister back living there and my uncle there obviously he's brain washed my dad to think that I don't take Care of my child he had a friend over and who was playin w the boy me while my hub was on the playstation who wakes up after working all night hearing the child scream and cry cuz my boy wants to watch a movie I tell my hub to get off and let him watch a movie o he's not going to watch it at least it will make my child happy its not bout my hub its bout the kid my son told my good friend that daddy mean this hurts me I'm trying to divorce him but I still owe 1000 to my lawyer and my hub running his mouth you won't get the house and I'm not signing the papers you don't have to sign the papers the court will my friends most of them there apt leases run out soon so I can't move in then move out and I can't stand being home w him.... I don't answer my phone after 50 times I finally answer it cuz I can't take it anymore so I tell him I'm w a good friend if he know them he will leave me alone I mean he asks me everyday have you talked to this and that person its none of his business I'm sick of this I feel like its all my fault he's brain washed me to think I'm fat and ugly and I know I'm not but that is how much he has tortured me what kind of man disrespects there woman by lookn at porno I understand its a guy thing but he has a wife makes me feel like I'm not good enough and he doesn't have a job he got laid off 2 wks ago so I'm stuck being his mama cleaning up after him I'm running out of excuses just to get out the house!

Until you stop coming up with reasons to stay, you won't leave. if you wanted out you would do anything you had to do to get out, including going to a shelter, there is always help out there for people who are truly seeking it. Hopefully you wake up soon for your child's sake.

I'm trying to do everything I even left and lived w my friend becky but she lived 30 min from my work and workn 4 nights during the week driving a gas hog durango it was hard keeping gas in it.... You've never been in a situation like this I'm scared to death of him finding me you've never been tortured or had a man call your child a whinny butt kid but that's not his words I went back just for him to sleep in his crib which I know I'm dumb for but her place was filthy and I couldn't let my child sleep there hopefully in the next 2 weeks to a month my friend and I will have an apt and Blake my not won't have to worry bout daddy being mean I'm not coming up w excuses to stay why do you think I paid 500 to my lawyer? And what am I going to do at a sheltor w my child there? I have woken up at least I'm not fighting back w him I'm trying to find a good place for my boy

"You've never been in a situation like this"

Really? I didn't know we knew one another.

"you've never been tortured or had a man call your child a whinny butt kid"

Again you seem to know a lot about me.

You left and then went back because you drive a gas guzzler, get rid of it, use transit, find a ride, take a bicycle. Women and children's shelters are for just that, women and children. As I said there are always answers out there for people who are truly looking for them.

O ok obviously I repeat I'm not giving excuses to stay take your advice or don't ask for it well if your gonna be rude and a smart*** to someone you don't know well its all good that's just the way the cookie crumbles seems like I'm the bad person yea I'm making excuses to stay when I paid lawyer 500 stayn w friends so obviously ppl can't read so if ppl gonna be all rude and put there 2 cents in then I don't need it thought I could post something and get advice on here but instead critisism but its good tho

O and another thing you can't get rid of a gas guzzler till you find another car money doesn't grow on trees ya know

You did get advice, none of it was "smart a**" advice or responses either. You should learn to read what is written instead of just picking out pieces you don't like. If you left, you also went back or you wouldn't be here asking advice. Women and men struggle everyday to get out of these situations, so to put yourself right back in it, that's on you, not on us. As I said people should do anything possible to protect their children even if it means going to a shelter, sorry that offends you, but that's real life. I would live in my car if it meant my child was in a safer place.

Wish you luck.

I'm sorry to hear you're having such a bad time.
Maybe the first stop, as you've not put anything down in your posts about talking to him about his problem, is to tell him how it makes you feel and tell him that if he doesn't go to anger management you'll leave. Unless he does this immediately, then you leave. Stay with a friend. Your parents might have a lot of people at thier home, but I am certain they would not turn away their daughter and grandchild when there is an abusive man that you are running from.
I don't know whether you've read much on the subject of domestic violence, but the pattern repeats itself with the kids who witness it.
Unless you do something to help yourself and your son, your son will grow up with the idea that he can beat women also. Maybe he'll get caught and end up in prison for beating his wife when he becomes a man.
Do you want to ruin your babies life by being to afraid to leave this man? I don't think you do.
The only choice you have is to change this situation.

You obviously have incredibly low self-esteem and self worth and seem to believe that you deserve the way that this man treats you. No woman deserves to be beaten. And no child deserves to have to witness the person they love most in the world being hit and abused.

Please, please get out of there. There are helplines for women in your position.
Try these websites for help: http://www.ncadv.org
http://www.ywca.org/site/pp.asp?c=djISI6PIKpG&b=297539

Take care & look after your baby.

All I'm going to say is..

"I've told my parents bout all this and even gone to my sister my blood and they think to stay together for the kid"

Leave, for your childs sake.

Well I got him kicked out last night he was throwing things calling me names and tried to throw me out the bed so I'm very proud of myself for calling the cops I'm getting a protective order if I was rude its cuz I've been through a lot and thanks to friends and you guys ill be ok ill be a single mom but I'd rather be safe then my child growing up scared to come home so I've actually done something good!! I'm proud of my son and me! Thanks guys