What to say when you're pregnant.??

  • Mary Daphne
    11 years ago

    I'm a teenage mom-to-be. how do i tell my parents that im pregnant?

  • Britt
    11 years ago

    The only thing you can do is sit them down and tell them. If you're closer with one I may tell them first and ask them to help you tell the other, maybe that will be easier.

  • Kevin
    11 years ago

    Set your house on fire, then as you stand outside watching it burn to the ground, tell them then. It won't be as much of a shock.

    : /

    You plan to go though with the pregnancy then? You do have options to you know, and your parents don't have to know. Not advising anything, just sayin it is your life and your body.

    best of luck.

  • Britt
    11 years ago

    Yikes, thats kind of a terrible thing to throw out there...

    Right it's her life/body, I agree with that, but abortion has the potential to create fertility issues, or have severe psychological issues. I wouldn't suggest doing something so huge behind your parents backs.

  • Kevin
    11 years ago

    Is abortion more terrible to you Britt, than a teenager who doesn't feel she has any options and goes through with a pregnancy that may not be a good thing for her at this stage in her life?

    We don't know much about her situation, but it doesn't sound like the pregnancy was planned, or if I'm reading her post properly even something she really wants or has decided on.

    Don't bust me chops for offering her advice she might not get from anyone in her real life. Posting here to me suggests she is looking for alternative opinions she won't get from her friends/family.

    ps, every medical procedure has the potential to go wrong, including giving birth. Check the stats on that.

  • Britt
    11 years ago

    My issue with your advice was going behind her parents back on it. I disagree with abortion, but that is my personal stance and I am not going to stop someone else from making what I feel is a poor decision.

    I know the stats, but I'm saying if someone has an abortion, keeps it a secret and then has complications. More and more issues arising. It needs to be discussed, not just a terminated pregnancy and act as if it never happened. Female hormones alone will make it incredibly difficult.

  • sibyllene
    11 years ago

    I think something everyone in this thread so far can agree on is that you need a support system. It would help if you told someone - it doesn't even have to be your parents right away. But someone mature who you trust (teacher, older sibling, cousin, aunt, school counselor) who can talk it over with you and help you figure out a plan. They might even have advice on how to tell your parents. Pregnancy is a super-stressful thing anyway, you shouldn't have to go through it alone. If you were to talk to someone like a counselor, they are trained on how to handle situations like this, and would probably be a great and comforting resource.

  • Decayed
    11 years ago

    In my opinion, you SHOULD tell your parents, and since I guess you are living with them, then they will sure notice that, so it is best for you emotionally to tell them as soon as possible because eventually, everybody will know....

    Abortion?

    I do not advise abortion at all (especially if you are at not so early stages), for you are an adult now, and with such a big thing that probably you have done with your own free will, you SHOULD be responsible. You had unprotected sex. You bring the child. You raise it. It is your whole responsibility. And as an adult, you shouldn't run from that. I know I said responsibility so many times... But, for your sake, for your family's sake, and for your unborn child, you ought to show some level of responsibility.

    And for the one you had sex with (I'm still unsure here if you were raped or forced to have sex), do Philipine's laws stand beside women much?
    That guy should share responsibility with you. And if he doesn't, then you ought to make him suffer in prisons or something.

  • Exostosis
    11 years ago

    I dont mean to interfere.

    Philippines has set the age of sexual consent as 12, but contact with minor (under 18) is an offence, if the minor consents to the act for money, gain or any other remuneration or as the result of an influence of any adult person.

    Either way, women can start to show as early as 10 weeks. And in about 4 to 6 months, it will be apparent. A women during pregnancy needs constant caring. A good diet is important. Appointment's with the doctors will be regular. There will be mood swings later on. At the age of 17, there will be school/college to attend, which will be missed. There is career to focus on. Although raising the child would be the priority.

    It would be advisable to approach an adult whom you trust, and then soon enough involve parents. And do involve the father of the child.

  • Britt
    11 years ago

    TWELVE?!?!?!

  • Exostosis
    11 years ago

    ^ Details.

    Sex with any child up to the age of 12 is classified as forcible rape. Sex with someone over the age of 12 but less than 18 is permissible as long as the age difference between the two is less than 10 years. Thus a 20 year old can have sex with a 15 year old but a 26 year old can not have sex with a 15 year old. See the selected quotes below and the full law in the links.

    ``"Article 266-A. Rape: When And How Committed. - Rape is committed:
    "1) By a man who shall have carnal knowledge of a woman under any of the following circumstances:
    "a) Through force, threat, or intimidation;
    "b) When the offended party is deprived of reason or otherwise unconscious;
    "c) By means of fraudulent machination or grave abuse of authority; and
    "d) When the offended party is under twelve (12) years of age or is demented, even though none of the circumstances mentioned above be present.

    ``(a) "Children" refers to person below eighteen (18) years of age or those over but are unable to fully take care of themselves or protect themselves from abuse, neglect, cruelty, exploitation or discrimination because of a physical or mental disability or condition;``

    ``Any person who shall keep or have in his company a minor, twelve (12) years or under or who in ten (10) years or more his junior in any public or private place, hotel, motel, beer joint, discotheque, cabaret, pension house, sauna or massage parlor, beach and/or other tourist resort or similar places shall suffer the penalty of prision mayor in its maximum period and a fine of not less than Fifty thousand pesos (P50,000.00): Provided, That this provision shall not apply to any person who is related within the fourth degree of consanguinity or affinity or any bond recognized by law, local custom and tradition or acts in the performance of a social, moral or legal duty.``

    Source(s):
    http://www.chanrobles.com/republicactno8... (Anti-Rape Law)
    http://www.chanrobles.com/republicactno7... (Special Protection of Children Against Abuse, Exploitation and Discrimination Act)

  • Decayed
    11 years ago

    Gaurav, I think that is a horrible law!

  • Kevin
    11 years ago

    I advised you originally to speak to your Doctor about your options, and I still think you should understand you have the right to do so without telling anyone.

    If you decide to keep the baby, sure tell everyone and get a support group in place but don't feel pressured to have a baby just because you got pregnant.

    There is so much we don't know about this situation it is hard to give specific advice. If you take anything away from this thread, just remember it is your body, your life and your choice and don't let anyone tell you different.

  • pixie
    11 years ago

    By reading your post, I am assuming you are going through with the pregnancy. Based on that assumption, no one can tell you what to do at this point. Read all the posts, ignore the ones that argue about rape, abortion, and how you should have been responsible (I am sorry but what's done is done and she cannot turn back time people!). And after all that and thinking, make your decision.
    I have had my experience with teen pregnancy with my mother and sisters. My mother waited until my grandmother basically noticed and though things were different and parents were strict (my grandmother no exception; perhaps she was on of the hardest), my grandmother helped my mother. But my oldest sister could have suffered very much during the time my mom was hiding her pregnancy.

    Parents are your parents even if you are going to be a parent yourself. If you are afraid that your parents will kick you out or their reaction will be negative, have someone be with you when you tell them, be it a favorite aunt, older sibling, school counsoler, or doctor.
    If it was me, I know my parents would be disappointed but would help me with everything I needed. If that is the same with you, then just tell them. Time is very important in this situation. You need to be healthy so unless you are paying your own medical bills/ have your own insurance, then tell them straight away. Try to take that ball out of your throat and say "Mom, Dad- I know what I am going to tell you is not going to make you happy but I am pregnant..."

    If the father is going to be involved then I would suggest having him there with you. In my family, respect is very important. If the father does not go with you when you tell them, he may be viewed as a jerk for lack of a better word.

    Now the decision is yours and the only way you can tell them is by saying "I am pregnant,".