Lyrics

I have this posted in my poems...but i want other to tell me what they think of the lyrics..I have gotten mostley good comments on it..but I got a few bad..but if ne one has ne helpful tips to make it better..plz! let me know :D

thanks! :D
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I'm SO sorry that its long!, but plz plz read it!..I promise, it's not as long as it seems.
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This Isn't What I Need
Alternative/Punk/Emo
Related Music : The Trend, Hawthorne Heights.
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(Verse 1)
I'm trying to move on, But the pain it brings is still
Like a knife in my chest, Hurts so bad it can kill.

The memories of you, Seem to run through my mind.
So I slowly close my eyes, But I see you every time.

My life is all of you, Even more if it can
Tears roll down my cheek, It's all part of your plan

The signs of our destiny, are far beyond our reach
Well hold together in our time, our love is all we will preach

(chorus)
As I thought, you were wrong, just like every other time
Your broke my heart, and just let it bleed this isn't what I need

(Verse 2)
At times when I am weak, you're there to make me strong
I wish you were here, In my arms where you belong

The cries that I have formed, seem to spread throughout my eyes
I'll hold on to this love, But the hope in us dies.

This life that I live, Is pulling me apart
Like a slap in the face, or a stab in the heart

It seems that dreams are real, but then you're forced to wake
I know I'm not you're prefect love, but I am you're perfect mistake

(chorus)

(Verse 3)
As I'm walking these halls, and I see you pass me by
I see that look on your face, makes me want to ask you why

I gave you my heart, and you made it decay
Like the angels in the sky, I'll slowly fade away

The blood that's in my hand, Is from your finger tips
the look in your eyes, and touch of your lips.

The senses of our demise, lingers on in my head
Joy is not of this, crimson cries are shed instead

(chorus)
As I thought, you were wrong, just like every other time
You broke my heart, and just let it bleed this isn't what I need

Are you surprised!(-As I thought, you were wrong,) that I'm making it all alone,
(- just like every other time) with out your
fear,(-You broke my heart) bring me down,(- just let it bleed)
I'm on my own.(-this isn't what I need)(x2fade out)

*The ones in ( ) are sang in the background :D