Please comment here on my song. Would really appreciate it.

this is a song me and my friend are working on. we would really love some feedback from everyone. its a slow romantic song. thank you. ill vote and rate 3 of ur poems in return. :D -Mike

I just cant wait to see.
The love you have for me.
You know I'll love you true.
And I'll be here for you.

And I'll run just to catch a single tear.
And I'll fly just to take away you fears.
And I'll be there through the years.
Because I do love you so.
I do love you so.

I wanna feel your touch.
Because it just hurts too much.
To be apart from you.
There's nothing I can do.

But run to be there by your side.
And fly to hold you when you've cried.
And I'll stay till those tears have dried.
Because I do love you so.
I do love you so.

I'll get to see your pretty face.
When you're back from a distant place.
I'll get to kiss your tender lips.
And finally feel your finger tips.

till then,

I'll run to be there everyday.
I'll fly even if those skies are gray.
And there's no cost to great to pay.
Because I do love you so.
I do love you so.

thank you night tears. glad that you like it. :D

Mike

can anyone else please comment on my song?

Mike

thank you for the advice Silence Kills. Will put it to good use and hopefully come up with some better and more powerful lyrics. :D in the mean time will anyone else please comment.

Mike

Hey, This is a great song, its really sweet and brngs a tear to my eyes. A little something to help, just a suggestion, dont put full stops at the end of each line, read it as if it was one long paragragh and find where you need pauses so you can put nothing, commas, collons, semi collons, full stops extra whee and only where you need it- but mate- thats awsome and you guys deseve a 6 out of 5 for that coz thats amazing! Keep it up, you have awsome talent!

oh and btw- dont worry bout the 3 poems lol, if you want to, you can check out Drown,Drown,Drown and give me some constructive critism- thankies (",)