[Please? Really Need Critism && Advise!]

Heyy, if anyone has any spare time or is willing to be very kind (Lol) then would you please have a look at my poetry? I am open to critism and any offered I will be very grateful for. So please and thankss so much!

Ye Seul

Anyone at all? Please? I would love you foreverr! =P

Please? This would really mean alot to me? Out of the kindness of your hearts? Pleasee?

yea no problem ill take a look. =)

Thannnkkkk youuuuuuuu soooo muchhhH!

Is anyone else as kind as those two? =P