Boyfriend Problems

Okay so me and one of my best friends started going out about a month ago when he confessed that he liked me. i was very happy because i liked him too. anyways, he is now with his dad in harrisburg (PA) for a month. i really do miss him but sometimes i find myself thinking about this other boy. now i don't like this other boy but when i think about him, i feel like i do. i really do like my boyfriend but i just don't know. any help?

You're young...it's normal.

^
^ i agree. it's okay to like multipul boys. but if you like one better then your BF, not so good. if you like someone other thenn your boyfriend i'd let him know that you need time to sort out your feelings. but remember YOU ARE YOUNG. you don't need this drama

'it's okay to like two boys but only if you don't like one more than your boyfriend'

what horrible logic. if you're even questioning this, are you mature enough to be in a relationship? it's simple, break up with your current boyfriend, because you're easily drawn away and to doubt things that shouldn't even come to mind.
or go on a break, to clear your head and figure it out, that always helps.

^ Not all of us function your way though. For some of us, we can like more than one person at a time. If you can focus on liking just one, good for you. Do keep in mind that that doesn't make it wrong for people to be interested in more than just one. Who's the decide what's acceptable and not in a relationship? As long as you and your partner(s) agree and it's safe and legal...why not? On the other hand, if it's anything bad that you don't want your bfs or gfs to know...then it's questionable whether what you're doing is right.

There be she...Britt...the almost always sensible one :D

Ok. trust me i wont cheat. thats one thing i'll never do. well everyone, thanks for the advice. (;

What are relationships about? Trust? Honesty? I'd say so. If you like someone else and feel that you have to hide your feelings from your boyfriend, or yes, if you like this other person MORE than your boyfriend...there is something wrong. Guilt goes into effect for a reason.

I'd say you should figure out your feelings before someone gets hurt.

Yeah because chances are... if you're thinking of this other boy constantly thien you may like him. But sometime it's just infatuation and infatuation is okay as long as it don't go farther. Figure out uyour feelings.

You say that some people function differently, those people aren't in true relationships. Open relationships usually don't work out for most people, and did she describe hers as an open relationship? If her boyfriend's gone for only a month and she's questioning thoughts about another boy, she's merely just not mature enough to handle a relationship to SEE that she has no need to be worried, she's obviously just not ready for that kind of relationship.

I know it'd be difficult to just throw it away and move on, but I was just saying that she's making things difficult when they shouldn't be, and if she's that easily lead by false drama, she shouldn't be in a relationship at that point in time.

Please define true relationships...

Even interactions that are faulty can still be called "relationships"..and so true to it's name :P She didn't say the bf didn't agree on an open relationship either. They haven't even talked about it. Having more than one target of interest does not make you immature. Just because you have interest in someone, doesn't mean you'd have to be with them too. It's a complete lie for most of us to say "I haven't had a thought about people other than my girlfriend/boyfriend once I get into a relationship with her/him"

But so soon? I never had a single thought about another guy other than Jeff for at least a year and a half, maybe more...at that mark, I started becoming interested in other people, but mainly because Jeff and I were hitting rough times...now that we've overcome them, I very rarely think about anyone else (once again). We're all different.

Is it a guy thing?! haha...-_- I don't think it is. I guess it depends on the person and whether they are satisfied with the relationship. I think things would be different if, at your one month mark with Jeff, he had to leave for something and let's say it was your first or second relationship.

Oh and "very rarely" or "really really really rarely" still doesn't equal an "I don't..period." So you do still think about others.

I don't think this forum was intended for people to fight about having feelings for other people while in a relationship.......
haha.

Who is fighting?

"Chaotically Me" seemed a bit b**chy in that last post. maybe it's me.

Jeff is my third boyfriend, so no...he's not my second, haha...but what's the difference? I remember NEVER thinking about anyone else the entire 8 months or so that I was with my first boyfriend. We were completely in love and planned on getting married (typical, right? hahaha.), but my parents forced us to break up. Long story. Anyway, about Jeff. Actually, after the very first week we were together I had to go on a family trip to San Diego for 2 weeks to see my mom's best friend and her son, Randall. Randall and I have grown up together and up until that trip, I had always had a crush on him. However, during the trip, all I wanted to do was go home and be with Jeff. I think the start of a relationship, if no other period in time, both people normally have tunnel vision. New love is so exciting, if you're already thinking about someone else...well, good luck.

-_____-
I see how hard it is to communicate in this world...perhaps I should only post answer to topics such as "girlfriend problems" so I don't get confused for a bitch...

Actually i think the statement "acting/sounding bitchy" can be used for a guy or a girl, cause it's not actually calling the person a bitch.

Men can be called bitches as well. It makes just as little sense ;)

Did I ever say that she was immature for liking another boy at the same time, or questioning her feelings? No, I said she was immature because she was so worried about it she doubted herself.

A true relationship, to me, is one person with another person and no trust issues about whether they have feelings for somebody else.
If she lead that other 'liking' to something more, it'd be considered an emotional affair. And if she even questioned a physical affair, etc etc etc.

So really, everything I said still goes. I was using an open relationship as an example of the chaos that she thinks she's getting into, when she's not, so she's either immature or unexperienced. Immaturity in relationships just doesn't work.

Hmm...then most people wouldn't have "true relationships". Emotional affair? You are too strict, BangBang :P I had you wrong and thought that you meant all people who had multiple interests are immature. Oh well...what you said goes for yourself just as my approach to relationships works for me.

My apologies on implying that the word "bitch" is only meant for females...and Jane, you're right. It is quite senseless.