PLEASE! PLEASE! I'M IN NEED OF ADVICE. HELP!

Hey ya'll what's up. Glad you can help me!

Okay, I've been going out with my current first boyfriend for about 3 1/2 months. And I really like him and he likes me a lot. He's the most king gentleman every, he makes me feel comfortable about myself, and always put a smile on my face. He is just perfect. And I have been kind of upset lately because my mother nor nobody really approves of because he is mexican and he is like 2-3 years older than me. Everybody seems to hate mexicans and my mom wants me to say goodbye to him and never talk to him because she thinks he is out to get me. Which is the case, he is really nice and really cool to talk to. And I really really really dont want to let him go. I will probably go into a deep depression and kill myself, trust me I have though of it before. It seems like he makes me better whenever i see him. And I cant go without talking to him... EVER!. i REALLY HONESTLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO. i CANT STOP SEEING HIM. i REALLY CANT. And my mom does not know I still talk to him at all. I cant really talk to my mom abut anything deep I am feeling because she always shoots me down everytime. She not really the person I would talk to about anything. I'd rather talk to a therapist or an acquaintance than my mom and thats real talk actually. Can't talk to my mom, I really frustrated, I really dont know what to do. I'm going to go crazy soon... HELP!!!

Wow, tough spot eh?

Heres what I think. Youre only 14, so that means hes what 16-17 ish? I really dont think that a 14 year old needs to be so...reliant on a boyfriend. I really dont. You have your whole life ahead of you, so does he. I wouldnt waste time fretting over this. It sounds more like a withdrawl from him than anything. I would just lay off a bit. Maybe not SEE him as much, talk to him though. Talk with people and your mom and help them see it as you do. Dont start getting all rebelious and going behind your mother's back. Thats when real problems will arise. Just take it slowly. !4 is awfully young to be getting too into a guy. Maybe have your boyfriend get to know these people better so they see that not all mexicans are bad people. But dont get so worked up over it (easier said than done, I know), but just try to take it slowly. If all else fails, tell your mother that you cant just STOP cold turkey, that you need to ease off. She was once a youngin like you, she should understand.

Thats just what I think. Sorry if that didnt help at all.

-Peace out-

Darlena,

Babe, as much as it hurts the truth is that you are only 14. If he is 2-3 years older than you, then the truth is that this young man is too old for you.

I know that a broken heart at any age is very painful and feels as though it will never end. I also know that in reality you will find someone else that you will have even stronger feelings for them.

You should respect your mothers wishes despite how much pain you shall endure. Your mom is only looking out for your best interest and that should be respected.

You say that you cannot talk to your mother about anything, but have you tried asking her for a psychiatrist or something like that? Have you tried telling her for no reason at all that you love and appreciate her even though it does not always show.

I agree with you in the fact that race does not matter. The color of a persons skin should in no way dictate the emotions of the heart.

However, despite that I want to express strongly that you are still so young and there is no reason that you should be in a hurry to grow up much too soon.

By taking the stand and the notion that this is the only male for you then you are also stating that you are ready to be an adult and live your life as such.

Oh, babe, I know that this is hard for you and that the pain seems unbearable, but I promise the pain does ease.

~~Sher

So r u saying i should break up with him

Well, i dont think you should be so relient on him, thats for sure. i wouldnt say break up with him, but i think maybe family counseling might help if you cant talk to your mom. but ill tell you from experience, it may seem as if the world has caught fire and your life is ending, but if it comes to the point where you must say goodbye, then so be it. you are you, not you-and-him. you are an induvidual and shouldnt need anybody but yourself. and, at your age, your parents.