Comments : My Love Is Now Closed

  • 16 years ago

    by BlueEyedMystery

    Once again, the idea of this poem was good, but you really need to check your grammar.

    For The Time Well Being
    ^^I'm not even sure that makes sense. Just try "For the time being". It will make more sense.

    A Person Came In And Ruin It Inside
    ^^Ruin should be ruined, and I don't think you should use inside again after it was the ending word for the line above.

    Because It Was Only One Other Person
    ^^I think that should be "Because she was the only person"

    My Love Open Up.
    ^^Open should be opened.

    Sorry about all the corrections, but I hope they've helped a little. I think your can make your ordinary poems more better.

    Keep writing!
    Cayce

  • 16 years ago

    by FlawlesslyTarnished

    I like the idea of the poem. :]
    And I liked this line.
    "Now Its Closed And Getting Repaired Over Time."
    it was deep, intense. 5/5.