Comments : Through My Eyes

  • 9 years ago

    by XxToWriteLoveOnHerWristxX

    I think it's absolutly amazing! you had some good, strong words in your peice. i cried too. just thinking that a close friend of mine could actually die made me love this poem even more. 5/5 niiiiice

  • 9 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    I often don't read my own poems but there are a few that I read every once in a way because they always seem to make me think, make me emotional. I really like this piece because we often don't realize that just because somebody is smiling doesn't mean there happy. The eyes really tell the whole story and it's a shame most people don't care enough ot even glance. Excellent poem I could elate to it all so well :) 5/5 GodsGift23

  • 9 years ago

    by Lemon Square Bear23

    Wow girly that was amazing!!!! it was very deep and worded perfectly. you did a wonderful job on it. it was truly outstanding!! id have to say thats up there with the favs of mine of urs... keep it up!!! 5/5 always
    Kate~LSB

  • 9 years ago

    by Blueleo

    It's a scary thought to know how others would feel if they could touch your soul. I loved it. 5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by kimberly

    Writing from the heart is always good! Keep up the amazing work and remember alot of people feel the same way! you have great strength to be honest!! Take care kim

  • 9 years ago

    by Melanie

    AWESOME!!! I almost cried! It expresses a lot of feeling.

  • 9 years ago

    by Asher

    Beautiful everything was like putting you there you felt all of the emotion i love this
    ((5))

  • 9 years ago

    by End Of Eternity

    This is really a very nice poem, i loved it all the way, spl the following stanza

    Can you see my soul,
    As it's begging for help?
    Or all the loved one's I've lost,
    Can you see how I felt?

    and i truly believe in eyes, they surely says it all

    great write indeed

    all the best and take care

  • 9 years ago

    by Sourav

    I think it's a good poem. Certainly I enjoyed reading it. It flows well too. Very good piece of writing. Well done!

  • 9 years ago

    by Josh

    This is quite sad. It really brought back some hard memories but I mean that is exactly what poetry should be: picking out pieces and having them relate to your life and speak to you. i do have a suggestion: in the last line of the second stanza I would have written "That is living deep within me" it flows a little better and then third line of the fifth stanza where you say "Im trying to put back together the pieces of this puzzle of life" I would take out "the pieces of" again I think it might flow a little better. Like always if you want explanation just ask.

  • 9 years ago

    by Simply Josh

    Wow. Well as soon as I read it I was like "Damn that was great." As I read it I could just picture you writing in your diary and I can understand why you cried when you read it. The emotions were felt throughout this poem and it just invites you to read further and further. It really tackles the issue of identity and it can be hard so well done. Excellent work

    cheers, josh

  • 9 years ago

    by ash

    Very good poem. i do that all the time rereading my stuff. my poems are sometimes kinda like my dairy for me.

  • 9 years ago

    by stillmomsgirl

    "Can you see the visible lies that have broken my spirit?
    And the pain that always seems to find me?
    My eyes tell you all of this,
    Just take a glance into them, and you will see."

    This is my favorite stanza^^

    This poem is honestly the most touching thing I've ever read. Beautiful. Amazing. And every word that's a synonym to beautiful or amazing. It makes sense that you cried after reading this. It brought a tear to my eye and I don't cry very often.
    I can relate to this in many ways.
    50,000,000/50,000,000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • 9 years ago

    by Just Jade

    Omg ... this was beautiful ... my eyes are waterin and believe me not much moves me

    your an amazing writer ... never stop writin

  • 9 years ago

    by NinjaGirl

    When i first saw this poem, i thought it would be nothing special, but as i progressed through it, i realized how special it was. i like your idea of someone telling another to look into their eyes and say what they saw. and i liked how you asked if they saw this or if they saw that. it really is a special piece.
    some of the rhyming seemed a little bit forced, but most of it was brilliant.

    "Now, look into my eyes,
    And tell me what you see.
    Can you see the darkness,
    That lives deep within me?

    Can you see all my haunting dreams?
    Or all the secrets locked in my heart?
    Im trying to put back together this puzzle of life,
    Can my eyes tell you how I start?"

    ^^ ^^ ^^ ^^
    These two were my absolutely favourite stanzas.

    i could feel the emotion that you put into this and the description was amazing,

    5/5

    Keep Writing, lovely
    As Always,
    ~NinjaGirl~

  • 9 years ago

    by Jemma

    Wow, that's incredibly emotive!
    I especially like the stanza:

    'Can you see all the happiness I wish I could feel?
    Or all the visions running through my mind?
    What about all the truth I desire?
    But can never find."

    Actually just that line 'but can never find'. It struck me.

  • 9 years ago

    by Lousy Eyes

    This is a really good poem, strong yet sad. You can get so much from looking into someone's eyes, what they're really feeling inside and whatnot. And it's a true shame how sometimes people don't really see them. And so they don't ever really look at YOU. I really loved how ended this by changing the focus to another person. I'm trying to pick my favorite line or stanza, but I really can't. I enjoyed everything.

  • 9 years ago

    by Megan

    You said after you reread it you cried?
    well so did i..every time i reread it i saw the story and it made me cry a little more.
    very emotional
    i loved it.
    :) great job

  • 9 years ago

    by SweetGrief

    Can you see my soul,
    As it's begging for help?
    Or all the loved one's I've lost,
    Can you see how I felt?

    OMG it's an amazing powerful deep song, i really dropped a tear. specialy when I read this Par'! U r amazing, keep it up !!1 5/5 FOR SURE

  • 9 years ago

    by Nicko

    Some good stanza's here, good rhyme and flow, for me the metre falls away on some of your stanza's though and a little to wordy for me, but any poem written from the heart needs to be read

    Can you see my soul,
    As it's begging for help
    Or all the loved one's I've lost,
    Can you see how I felt

    I liked this stanza most

    Cheerz Nicko