I like this alot . It's very powerful , props to you for this one . I would pay attention to your punctuation though , because it really helps the reader better interperet your poem . Use semi-colons (;) to your advantage, and if you don't know how properly , look it up . This is fantastic though .. It really is . I think maybe you just write better free verse poems .
I like this poem a lot. It is great that you are venting your feelings and they are put into perspective very well. In your second line you have repetition of 'you see me' I am not sure if it is meant to be like that or is it simply an error?
But otherwise you have written your emotions very well and this is a great and easy poem to read and relate to.
Good job! = ]