Comments : I remember

  • 6 years ago

    by Rania Moallem

    This is a one poem that flows with harmony !!
    I love the silence that I was diving in as I finished this amazing poem that i can't decide still if the heart ache I got was a sad, or a happy one!
    I did not realize that i even finished reading and so i went to reread and how i loved the emotions that you have shared the more i read the poem..

    Well worded, full of emotions, reminisced in a very talented way, original metaphors and breath taking poetic expressions..

    I do remember the years since then
    music danced upon my eyelids
    flutter of movements, as fast as the days
    blinked past, images saved or removed

    ^^^
    like this one, a very creative imagination.
    Creative word choice and description.. i find this
    mastered actually.

    I can't recall who said it first
    I'd like to believe it was you
    as it would be nice to know you loved me first
    if you couldn't love me longest

    ^^^^
    I so love this part like REALLY love it..how much can many sweet hearts :P relate to this?
    I think we all want to feel that the partner loved us 2st..yet wish they can love us the longest..
    and the way u ended it was Truly sad..this poem is too dear now.

    I remember the now, though
    Fights. Tears. Pointed fingers, sharpened to claws

    ^^^maybe you should re punctuate this between though and Fights)..it got me lost a bit until i read it again and again. Try read it ..and review ..unless am wrong XD

    anyway I must end this comment..on this perfect poem!
    added to my favs
    5/5

  • 6 years ago

    by DeafBeats

    So powerful!

  • 6 years ago

    by Skyfire

    I also liked the lines "it would be nice to know you loved me first/ if you couldn't love me longest." And the repetition of the first two lines again at the end really ended the poem on a powerful note for me. Those simple lines:"I remember nothing of that first meeting/
    other than you were there" seem to say so much more than I can even understand!

  • 5 years ago

    by silvershoes

    Oh Mo, this is so sad and so powerful.

    "I can't recall who said it first
    I'd like to believe it was you
    as it would be nice to know you loved me first
    if you couldn't love me longest"

    Could you have worded this any better? I don't think so. I know exactly what you mean here, and how it feels.

    Remember that love is a journey and we can learn to love the same person over and over again... sometimes we forget that we love them, but with time and with their patience (and enough of our own good grace), we remember.
    Im so sorry anyone has to feel the loss of that love though, no matter how brief or infrequent. It hurts.

    I know you don't log into PnQ or post up very often anymore, but I think about you now and then with an adoring smile mixed with a bit of cheekiness.

    Miss you so!

    Love ya. Come back and write again.