Comments : The Toothache

  • 5 years ago

    by Wild flower

    The title cought my attention, and I wanted to read this poem. It is BRILLIANT, the idea is amazing. I love everything about it. Awesome job:)

  • 5 years ago

    by The Princess

    Ouch. This poem needs a dentist not a comment, Larry. Which makes me wonder, have you seen one lately?

    • 5 years ago

      by Larry Chamberlin

      Actually it started out as a verbal torture for Nana.

  • 5 years ago

    by Rania Moallem

    Hahahah God Larry....I was so happy that I haven't read the post in the club before I slept that night, because when I read it along with zahra's and Josh's posts... I wondered whether to cry or laugh.

    you should start thinking of acting in SAW movie...haha seriously....this is too descriptive you know, and I think it really does need a very stable head :P to come up with that imagination, not everyone can describe something with that quality of details.
    It may seem funny, and well weird, but very deep!

    Then comes your evil...mind:

    n the quiet,
    lying in bed,
    no distractions,

    ^
    LIKE seriously ? ya thanks I did not know that -_- lol, beautiful Larry, and so factual.

    throbbing
    ^
    this isn't just a verb in gerund form, no. It is a very smart way to describe the situation, because it does really throb! Tick..tack...oh God... :(

    -----

    You can feel the sensitive
    gum tissue

    press painfully

    on the nerve

    ^^^

    yes press painfully on the nerve, lmao..you are so evil.

    with each pulse

    in red agony
    ^^
    red agony!!!this was very well thought of, you changed disgusting stuff into metaphors. Aint that just magical ?

    And actually the fact that your last lines are so true, realy really like..REALLY true cracked the hell out of me :talking about this :

    And you start thinking

    of the pliers,

    or a string tied to a doorknob,

    or a hammer.

    ^^
    well it just does get unbearable, you embarrass me. This is the lastttttttt time I skip a dentist's appointment.

    I promise you, my tooth will not ache anymore, I will not give you the pleasure to torture me, you wise big man.

    I LOVE IT, people should nominate this, it's too good not to be on the front page.

  • 5 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Lol, loved the ending, it shows the desperation of how much you need the pain to stop.

    i can understand this feeling as have siffered it and there is nothing like it, the way I sometimes said it was like my tooth was having a migrane while throwing a tantrum and doing jumping jacks!!

    Excellent poem and I hope your toothache ends before you reach for that hammer!

  • 5 years ago

    by Decayed

    LOL; my jaw ached me for 2 days... now I still have some soreness in my mouth.. God, teeth hurt :/

    I really feel the need to crack my jaw with a hammer!!!!!!!!!!!111

  • 5 years ago

    by Rania Moallem

    Oh..Easy boy..lol

  • 5 years ago

    by Rusheena

    Your imagery is spot on! My gums were throbbing just reading it. 5/5

  • 5 years ago

    by Hellon

    I was trying to avoid this poem but..being the curious person that I am I just had to visit! My prime fear (apart from snakes as you know) is the dentist! I never used to be like this but now...I went recently..not that I was in pain but one of my caps broke..right at the front of my mouth so..off I went and...$7,000 later I have my nice smile back...to match the broken tooth up with the other caps which were stained with too much coffee and Cigs would have cost $2,200 so I decided to get them all replaced....just could imagine myself taking teeth out to put on the night stand!

    But...nightmares?....I walked round the bloke a few times each visit before I could open the door!

    • 5 years ago

      by Larry Chamberlin

      Hah! I can picture that: one beauty of a pearly white surrounded by real world coffee stained.

  • 5 years ago

    by Darren

    This is great Larry, I know exactly how you feel and I have also considered pliers and the like.

    The best thing about this is when you read it my mouth actually started to throb!!!

    There is real pain in this.

  • 5 years ago

    by Rania Moallem

    Still waiting for the headache challenge poem! yap 2nd is week over Mr!

  • 4 years ago

    by zombiepikachu

    I'm so excited to read this!c: I wrote a short, flash fiction story over this concept. This is beautiful. I really understand how this feels, and I'm so glad. I've got a lotta respect for you, after reading this. C: