Comments : A Kiss of Winter(Tanka)

  • 5 years ago

    by Chelsey

    I love this piece dear!! Omgosh the beauty in the imagery is just profound..however

    fragile arts of nature are born
    ^ has 8 syllables and it should have 7 ..Think of some rewording that wouldnt take away the stunningness of this...

    Perhaps: nature births us fragile art.

    Aside from that, this is an excellent nature piece :)

  • 5 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Casting frigid winds,
    where white blankets cover land,

    ^^A nice opening for the reader to see a winter scene and feel the biting wind..very nice!

    -A kiss of winter-

    ^^I like this line. Just imagine the land to be kissed by kiss..liked this!

    fragile arts of nature born
    breathed by winters cold embrace.

    ^^The closing draws a nice picture where one sits and watch the once green beauty been "embraced" by a cold cold embrace.

    Enjoyed the read :)