Comments : Reflections

  • 9 months ago

    by Meena Krish

    My my what a read! As I was following the story it
    just took me deeper and deeper into this world and images
    of Egypt and its olden times kept playing. Yet behind all this
    sadness lays heavily which you have written with a whole
    different outlook....take care.

  • 9 months ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    Mark :-) I was intrigued by this and have had to read it a few times to get a grasp, which says a lot about the complexity of your inner mind!
    I hope you don't mind a long and rambling comment, I'd love to know if I've interpreted it correctly?

    1) "The eye of Ra reveals the path soon to be taken. This journey called mine has come to an end. Quaint it seems, no reminisce advisable, as sadness cannot taint the inevitable. To run - to voice reason will only hasten the few moments left to be."

    'the eye of Ra' Egyptian sun God (I looked it up) ... sets the scene of ancient Egyptian times maybe? Sun shines (maybe a dawning of realisation) to show that your (the protagonist) life has come to an end. There's no point in looking back, being sad about it or trying to escape or plead for your life, it would just waste the little bit of time left.

    2) "As if vainly, I repeat the query 'who will remember me'? Certainly not the commoners whose berating cheers fluctuate with each fallen blade. For many like myself are ahead and many are also dead. The purest form of opportunism dictated all major events though this privileged life. Such a philosophy left no-one to even wonder if that voracious man is still alive."

    So much info here! So the protagonist is maybe Egyptian elite, worrying about how he'll be remembered. The commoners are witnesses, perhaps to the killing of more than one elite member, depicted by apparently several falling blades, and they seem jolly pleased about it. Is the end of a ruling era perhaps?

    3) "No tear drop will fall on thine account. Hath man ever felt desolate as this - may his own life be sacrificed as is. Why not offer thine self to a God whose existence renders on the ancient texts of truth or lie. Such an end will at least give purpose and please a Deity or try."

    No one's going to cry over you when you die, feels terrible. May as well die for a good cause, in the name of a God who seeks the truth, it won't hurt to try to please him.

    4) "Another step taken towards the blade which will shed thy blood to the already full basket awaiting. The man once who would once raise his arms and proclaim a thousand reasons to spare own life in place of another. Where is that confident self worth now? The nurturer of each forgotten slumber."

    It becomes clearer now that this is a mass execution by guillotine. And this is a man who would usually fight to stay alive in place of someone else. His self worth is nowhere to be found at this point. I'm really not sure what the last line means ... is it that the loss of self worth now causes insomnia maybe?
    "The man once who would once raise his arms" ... it's a little clumsy having 'once' twice here ;-)

    5) "A tear will not be shed by even thine eyes. Why omit such emotion as sure that emotion will be called upon in the afterlife. Pray not Osiris question thine worthiness for pleasures or mercy! What will I tell this God of thine achievements when all others were shunned? An observer taunts "we starved whilst thou feasted!" "

    No one (himself included) is going to cry at his death. But why leave out emotions which may be needed after death? He's hoping that the God of death and resurrection (Osiris ... looked it up) won't question his eligibility for mercy, but a commoner reminds of his greed at the expense of the poor.

    6) "Yes Osiris I ate while my brothers withered away beside thy golden carriage! Worthy not of Ras' light I agree to any punishment. Just remember every moment behind what is left of this miserable time was spent in sorrowful reflection! Sorrowful enough? Nay no thought hath ever balanced the scales of justice to improve ones position."

    He admits to the above greedy lifestyle while the commoners starved, agrees he ought to be punished but wants it to be taken into consideration that he's now aware of his sins. It's not clear whether he's asking himself or if Osiris is asking him whether he's sorry enough. But claims that no, being sorry now isn't enough to justify what's been done and save himself from execution.

    7) "To outweigh further - the darkened desires acted upon without shame. Each hath their own and temper accordingly, except thine self. All pursued to their full length, debauchery of the most extreme. Voices of torture flood the plains of my mind accompanied by laboured breathing."

    To make things even worse, he admits, although everyone has their desires, they control them to an extent, but he acted upon all desires, to the utmost extreme and without shame. Either the crowd demand his torture, or he himself remembers acts of and this affects his breathing.

    8) "I turn to a squalor who dare attempt to share the name of this shattered being, "Sayeth not - this name is not worthy of announcement. The slice of the blade is too kind an end for this mortal husk! As I am done! Oh great one witness this surmise, oh Isis I plead thee - turn this soul to dust!"  "

    Seems he's now admitting that he's not even worthy of being announced at the guillotine, and even that is too kind a death for his sins. He asks Isis (goddess of wisdom and health) to witness his admission and turn him to dust!

    PHEW! I hope you enjoyed my interpretation Mark :-)