Comments : The Fade Out - Sonnet to a Secret (part one)

  • 6 years ago

    by Milly Hayward

    I don't know if I am reading this correctly but it sounds like some sort of illicit affair. With her being married and him being single. The meter and rhyming is excellent but the content leaves me feeling a little like its an uncomfortable secret. I don't know if that was your intention I suppose such secrets mean different things to different people. The use of words such as sloth made me think of someone lazily enjoying the pampering and almost enjoys the sleaziness of it. The fact that she has to return to cleverly cover what she has done, cover her tracks from whoever she is betraying and his fading from her truth implies she is happy to return to her other life and put him entirely out of her mind until the next time. This piece raises many moral questions about the character and his illicit love. An unusual choice of subjects for you Larry but most thought provoking

  • 6 years ago

    by Dagmar Wilson

    15 years is a long time talking about betrayal. She is washing him down sounds like washing the sins away. There is something not right with both of them unless they get aroused by this game they are playing. Eventually someone will get hurt and it is not going to be her. She is clever. Very interesting provoking and yet truthful. It happens all the time. All the best

  • 6 years ago

    by Em (marmite)

    Larry this is stunningly provocative and well portrayed would love to see a part two

  • 6 years ago

    by Larry Chamberlin

    I think part two will not be what any of you are expecting

  • 6 years ago

    by Larry Chamberlin

    *

  • 6 years ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    Oooh ... I'm so intrigued! I don't think she's the married one ... why would she clean him? She's removing traces of herself from him ... I think she's his carer ... there's a reason why he's laying like a sloth ... in his head it's love but to her ... she's maybe being paid? Sorry to sully it if that's not the case.

    I can't wait for the riddle to be solved! :-) x
    =^.^=