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There’s singles in your area and they want to meet
And by the look of their pictures you’re in for a treat
They’re sweet sexy and capable of being discreet
If you click on the link your transactions complete

So you click on the link because what’s the harm
And all of a sudden you’re feeling rising alarm
Let’s be honest you’re the very picture of charm
Covered in gravy stains reading animal farm

You can’t remember the last time that you kissed
Or trusted anything other than your own wrist
What if she hates you, you look like a cyst
Or maybe an extra from gorillas in the mist

Pulled out of your panic you’re hearing the bell
You feel your chest heave and your heart swell
And it’s there the police find you where you fell
12 days later as your mother complained of the smell