Comments : ((And Then))Lights Out*Bedtime

  • 12 years ago

    by Atomic

    I must admit, I don't quite get the ending of this poem. However, I like how you use your metaphors.

    My favourite stanza:

    "Hes out to get you
    Tear your flesh apart
    Hes looking to mend
    His broken heart "

    ( )_( )
    (='.'=)
    (")-(") Arrivederci!

  • 12 years ago

    by Marie

    I love it!!! I acually know how this feels!! I expecially like the part about the phone cause when i'm alone it always scares me!!! Keep it up!!

    Marie

  • 12 years ago

    by midnight♥lullibys

    Wow...very ...dark! 5/5

  • Wow, i loved this. Soooooooo dark !! I love the opening and ending. They work really well.

    XxX Cici XxX

  • 12 years ago

    by .

    Ha i like this poem alot!! 5/5 deffinately! Keep it up!
    Becky
    xoxo

  • 12 years ago

    by HansRik

    This is a truly amazing piece. It is very efficient throughout and the use of metaphors is excellent. I am really impressed by your talent. The diction, and the structure all help develop the meaning of the poem. The poem flows very well. Keep it up.

  • 12 years ago

    by Leona

    Wow very very good you have a alot of talent keep it up
    5/5
    Leona

  • 12 years ago

    by Carmen

    This one seems like a reverse to Revenge. great, nonetheless. your title should be And then. since thats what it said at the end

  • Wow that was DEEP...i really enjoyed it...i mean everybody is scared to be alone in they house even thou its all dark and everything is secure...our mindz just go crazy like that...5/5...very poetic

  • 12 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Very unusual poem. It's like a step by step suspense. Nice job. you can still add more imagery and details. keep it up

  • 12 years ago

    by TragicRomance

    Awsome dark poems hun! I loved it! It was ver original and I loved it!

  • 12 years ago

    by Katlynn

    Amazing job. i have some of my poems that just end like that i should put them up on here. but i love poems endings like that because you don't know what happened next and you can draw your own conclusion which is great. keep it up. keep on writing. love always and forever.
    Ps thanks for the comments.

  • 12 years ago

    by Ashlee Nicole

    5/5....You have such a creative way.....I'm still making someof it out in my head...But I LOVE your style girl...Awesome...

  • 12 years ago

    by Ashlee Nicole

    I think you should title it ...
    Whispers In The Dark ????? Yes No Maybe So??? I kinda like that...lol...
    Anyways...5/5
    ttyl
    Ash

  • 12 years ago

    by SSSAAMMMYY

    Nice poem! Keep it up!