Calamity

Your shaky voice tells me that he's gone but
believe this?
I cannot.
A full day of denial and disbelief,
and then,
I shut the door behind me,
expecting to see your figure at the top of the stairway.
The stairway remains empty.
Realization hits me, I sustain injuries.
My legs turn to jello,
my heart skips a beat,
my body contorts and slides down the door.
Tears extricate, ever flowing.
And I realize that you are
not here anymore to comfort
this kind of feeling.

We walked away from
some form of you, your body was
shattered.
We walked away with weighted hearts and clammy cheeks,
away from
a five year attachment, from something we never knew could
hurt this much.

I'm sorry that
I was too late.
You deserved better than
what I gave.

We walk this path to our eradication,
to our demise.
I don't plan on wasting this time.