Hmm.. I liked the last stanza best, because it made the most sense and was quite metaphorical.. The rest I didn't feel was as good as that.. Because of rhyming some of your stanza's did not make sense and this really took away from the poem itself.. Keep up the good work though.. 4/5

EXCELLENT work....at the start of the poem i thought you were just placing meaningless words in because they rhymed, but as i got to the bottom it all became clear...

again- EXCELLENT

october xx

This poem has a mystis quality close to my heart