Comments : Just you...and me

  • 10 years ago

    by Jade

    Such a good poem babe!! this is excatly what happened with my ex we broke up because of his jealousy and then he texted me saying i love u now i dont no what to do :( but very good still write more!!! xxxxxx

  • 10 years ago

    by tryinXtoXholdXmyXheadXup

    Very good write!! very heartfelt sweet and sad!! keep up the writing!! the language could have been stronger but very good poem other wise

  • 10 years ago

    by in.need.of.a.lucky.charm

    Aw. this was really good. i loved the repetition of "Just you..and me". very well done.
    Much love and many kisses,
    Bex

  • 10 years ago

    by MyDevotion

    O wow this poem is beautiful! i thought it was going to be too long for the topic but not at all it definatly carries through! i love it! 5/5! =D

  • 10 years ago

    by ellewen

    Okay well.. it reminded me much of a diary. You act like its a new day every few paragraphs. Just a little awkward, but I can deeply relate and I see where you are coming from. All relatinships seem like that. Great at first and thenthey slowly fall apart when you get more comfortable together. If you are still uncomfortable around eachother things are always great. Meh I hate how that works. anwayz, I think you got a little caried away and just went on a little to much in this one.

    "When I see you
    I blush a crimson red
    And when you speak
    Everything flutters through my head"

    this is my favorite stanza. Of coarse i always have a favorite. I like this. It really kinda inspired me in a way.

    Also just to say soemthing lol this remided me of the song "everywhere" by michelle branch at the beginning lol im not sure if you are familliar with it but if you are great lol, uhh i hae to go im gonna get in trouvle for being on late. Comment more tomarow if i have time buh byes

  • 10 years ago

    by David

    Now i know why everyone loves this poem and has all commented 5. i loved it!!! i wish i had wrote this poem. it was excellent.

    5/5 David

  • 10 years ago

    by azii

    So beautifully written!
    Nice job 5/5

    Keep it up

  • 10 years ago

    by xo kisses xo

    Awe! that is so sweet. i went through something similar to that...lol. that was a kinda long poem but it was worth it! 5/5

    xo kisses xo

  • 10 years ago

    by Teria

    "When I see you
    I blush a crimson red
    And when you speak
    Everything flutters through my head"
    ^ I absoulutely LOVED that stanza, along with that feeling. :D

    This was another great poem.
    You put your instead of you're once, I noticed.
    But, other than that you did a GREAT job, I loved it.

    Keep it up, hun.
    5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Italian Stallion

    Wonderful write with so much emotion. There are a lot of minor mistakes, I encourage you to re-read your writings for most of them have small errors within. Other than that, this was an amazing write with such heartfelt wording. Great Job.

    These lines, "Your everywhere to me" and "But your everything I want to see" and "Your always so happy" you used the wrong "your" it should be "you're"

    This line, "I hear your voice and your not there" should be, "I hear your voice and you're not there"

    These lines, "And now were together" and "Now were having problems" and "Now were here talking" you used the wrong "were" it should be "we're" for were is a place, and we're means we are.

    In this line, "Every thing's going great" the words "Every thing's" should be combined to make one word "Everything's"

    This line, "Is so great and so true" I felt would rhyme better if you changed it to this, "Is so great and true"

    This line, "Sitting her hand in hand" I don't think you meant "her" I believe you meant to use the word "here"

    This line, "This love of ours wont end" you need an apostraphy on the "wont" so it reads "won't"

    This line, "But for me it's a hard task" I believe you meant, "But for me it's a hard to ask"

    Peace, Joe

  • 10 years ago

    by Lisa

    This was very good. I really enjoyed it. At some parts it didnt flow together perfectly but still in all it was great. 5/5

  • 9 years ago

    by unspokken

    I think that this poem was awesome. And I loved ittt!* It had a good rythum and flow, and everytihgn went together at the time, every little word was in the right place. 10/10

  • 9 years ago

    by ilu

    That was very well written!!!!...
    beautiful Poem...
    5/5..

  • 7 years ago

    by IML

    I love this poem a lot. there are many great writings on this website, i dont know any as good as yours. you have a great talent that i wish i had.
    thank you for sharing this poem. i loved it