Comments : Jump

  • 11 years ago

    by Vegetable

    This poem has amazing rhythm and every single thought fits together so fluidly. I really enjoyed this. The rhyme is flawless, and really adds to the poem. I think lines 9-16 are my favorite. Great job.

  • 11 years ago

    by Katie

    Oh wow. I love this one. The vocabulary is really great, and the flow is wonderful. It rolls off the tongue well. Nice job. :]

    P.S. I don't have a tune to it. I've never even written lyrics before, so I'm not that good at it yet. It needs some work. But thanks for the comment.

  • 11 years ago

    by Tracy D Rollings

    Hi love your writing ,Excellent poem
    the presence of the
    black abyss
    that hides itself
    in you.
    well thought and well written , great job, 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Domino0792

    Hey, hows it going? I really loved this poem, it had depth and emotion which made me really enjoy it! Well penned, keep the great writting up! 5/5


  • 10 years ago

    by Carrotgirl

    Hi I was drawn in by your beautiful picture, hope that doesn't freak you out. Makes a change from seeing who's got the weirdess threads on the discussion board..... then check out their poems lol., I love the ending
    "you fear the thing that, most of all,
    you proudly thought you knew:
    the presence of the black abyss
    that hides itself in you."

    Two years ago I stood on that cliff face and made a dicission to carry on, maybe the black abyss is just too scary after all.

    People take what they want from others poems for me I your poem had extra meaning than most