Comments : Thinking of you...

  • 11 years ago

    by Gem

    Wow.. that had a lot of depth to it hun.
    I loved the whole 'bump' jolting back to reality
    Nicely written

    (P.S. Rhyming is easy once you get the hang of it =) I find free verse so so so difficult yet you make it look easy =)

  • 11 years ago

    by Roses and lilys

    Another cool one. 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by honeypot

    Hi Alex!

    I really like this poem ,and it is full of emotion! Really beautifuly written.

    my only suggestion would be to work with the lines, break them up a little to make them easier to read and flow.

    I loved it though! well done x

  • 11 years ago

    by ImNotPerfect20

    Wow lots of emotion!! great job.. 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Austin

    That was filled with emotion. Such a wonderful poem to read, i liked it :) like to see longer ones though ;)

  • 11 years ago

    by Ashleigh Skye

    Dieing = dying

    I liked this poem.. it was short and I liked how nothign rhymed.. the only thing I would change is I would put some metaphores in it.. makes it a bit more creative and more poem like instead of just seeming like a story.

  • I agree with Gem, you make it look easy. I have a hard time writing poems taht don't rhyme. Good work though, kiddo. I liked the message in this poem. =)

  • 11 years ago

    by xxSnow Angelxx

    Good work...very touching...sudden ride to reality...great work....u've done this one so a real well it up!

  • 11 years ago

    by Boy

    Aahaa it relates to me.. nice work i loved your poem offcourse words was also nicely used in this poem i willm ust give 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Jenni Marie

    This is beautifully written and so very sad at the same time...though short you managed to put such a lot of emotion and depth into this piece, and it makes for a very intense read.
    beautiful work.