First thing that attracted me to see this poem would be the title, interesting subject u got there...well, I muz say...so is ur poems...u use a rather indirect way to tell something, which I find it hard to do so myself, good effort...well done..
Well first of all I must tell you that I am sure you did not write this poem for it to be taken this way so I must explain what and why it reminds me of what it does.
Second, You have done an outstanding job with this and I felt so drawn into and couldn't wait to read the next line. Awesome.
As for the my analysis of this poem and what it reminded me of...... this is it.
I live in Georgia and back in July of 1994 we had a really huge storm ( actually a squall from an tropical depression ) it loomed over the midstate for days causing flooding to numerous areas. It was fourth of July and the interstate was gridlocked with traffic.
**Gray clouds looming overhead.
(The storm that wouldn't go away for days with constant rainfall)
**Decay and misery rising up from the ground,
(Reminds me of the cemetary it flooded (RoseHill) and there were so many caskets just floating down the river which the cemetary is located beside)
**that once gave life to smiles. (The people buried at the cemetary that once gave us all smiles in life)
**Painful screams echoing in the breeze. (People literally trapped in their cars and being washed away in creeks)
**The once cheerful sun burning flesh. ( like I said it was 4th of July and that is usually a big time at the lake and now it was still a big time at the lake but searching for people and rescuing them)
**Tainted water abundant during drought, (The city of Macon had no water during because of the flooding of the Water Maintenance depot) Among all the water from the flood we only had water that was tainted.
I hope you don't mind my own analogy of the poem. It was a great write and as I stated that I know it probably had nothing to do with that but it sure fit the subject very well. Kudos.
Omg.. so sad but yet so powerful.. well spoken, the flow was really good, I was able to see the image.. honestly I wish I could give you more.. but its already perfect .. its really good so anyway good job and keep up the good work.. srry it took me awhile to comment ur poem..
Wow, this piece is breath- taking. I can relate to it, and I like it from the beginning to the end. every stanza is greatly written, and the whole poem has superb wording.
I like the repetition of the first line in every stanza, it adds powerful effect to the piece.
Well done, 5/5 from me.