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by Baby Rainbow
Oh, interesting that your first poems were love poems! I do not know why this surprises me, but it does. I liked this poem content again, how you really describe every detail that you think was perfect about them, and the way he loved you. There were certain lines I felt held the poem back, like ...
His lips were warm,
- you could just have "his lips were comfortably warm"
There are a few places where you could change the two lines into one line like so, but I understand this was the style you wrote in back then.