1. I love mythological subjects, they've always been close to my heart ; ). I am wondering, though, at your distinction between Roman and Latin. Latin was the language spoken by the Romans, not another set of goddesses. Certainly, others in Italy were also speaking Latin, but I'm wondering perhaps if you meant to talk about "Roman and Greek." Even here, though, the Roman pantheon was derived almost entirely from the Greek, with only some names switched around, but most of the attributes kept. It could work, though.
2. The commas. I thought their prevalence made the reading stilted and shaky, but that might have just been because I don't know how you're intending to use them. I can trust that you know what you're doing, however.
3. mist - should be midst
4. Ruptured - should be raptured
Welp, that's all I can find! Off to read some more....
Brilliant thoughts Robert! I liked your optimum description of beauty! No one can deny or resist the effect of women beauty from the first look. The nice flow of almost all of your love poems is so enchanting and so enticing taking the breathes away. They attract the reader in such a way that he/she insist to finish reading till the end and wish it not ending. All these facts made me choose you as one of my favorite authors.
I encourage you to keep penning in the same way Robert. Thank you.