Comments : Care

  • 16 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Aww....this is really cute! Just some thoughts:

    "you make me feel like a can fly."
    a should be I.

    "My heart rings like a bell"
    I like this line, but it doesn't really go good with that stanza. I think you should say "My heart rings like a bell" with every.....
    or because you.......
    Just to go further into it so the reader understands it a little more. Otherwise, this poem is so adorable! Thanks for commenting on my poem, and have a Happy Easter!