For a first write, it's amazing! i'm not even that good and i have almost 300 poems. you definitely have a gift, hun. the vocabulary and the flow were superb....

btw, i love your icon. i know how that feels...

I believe that you the author got the dark feelings of rejection and heart brokenness out very poetically. Keep writing I know where you are coming from

Wow. great first write. loved it. i can definitly relate to this, hard to get over though.
Keep writing!

Love this poem.....it is great

I understand this piece completely. I've been through this quite a few times as well. Anyway, for a first write, this is pretty amazing. :] Keep it up. <3 5/5.

This poem was absolutely amazing. It showed so much feeling and the flow worked perfect. Good job! 5/5

.:CiNdY:.

I loved this poem for a first poem it was amazing and it really caught my attention I love young writers (like me) because it inspires me and proves we have a say this poem was flawless and really went with my mood nice job
5/5

Your words and your ideas are very well you created your own unique powerful ambiance which i'm pretty sure more people can relate with.. being rejected. great work!! keep it up!!

"Whence one has gotten so hurt."
^^^
Whence makes no sense here. I'd replace it.

Honestly, if it's your first write, I won't rag on you too hard.
But I'll give you some pointers.
If you're going to rhyme, make it a consist rhyme. (a,b,a,d throughout the entire poem or don't rhyme at all.)
Punctuation does wonders; it really helps the flow.
And put some <feeling> into it. Make me feel what <you> felt.

I hope those are little starting helpers. Keep trying. And remember to always write from the heart.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 3.5

Your first write, any good?????

Damn! It's better then good!

Your amazing!!!! The whole thing flowed perfectly and was extremely sad. It hurt me deep inside while reading your beautiful poem. You created a very exclusive piece here. Thank you for sharing a wonderful piece with us, poets.

^^5/5^^