I'm Sorry

by Tripp   Mar 23, 2008


Sheer emotional outlet. I know it isn't my best.

I'm sorry Becky, for everything I've ever done
I regret all that I've done times a million
I wish I could change things, I wish you would believe
I want you to know, that I never want you to leave

I know I'm a f**k-up and bad boyfriend
I know that I'm sorry and I will be to the end
I'm so sorry for all the pain and the hurt
I'm so sorry for treating you lower than dirt

I've messed up so many times, yet you've stuck with me
I've hurt you so many times, yet you've still loved me
I had it all and threw it away, I was so stupid
I ruined what was perfect, and I pissed off cupid

I'm so sorry for everything, so sorry for it all
Ever since we got off the phone, I can't help but bawl
I can't believe I messed things up as badly as this
I can't believe that I may never again feel your kiss

I can't believe I hurt you, and I wish I could change it
I'm so sorry, this relationship I would never exchange it
You were the best I could ask for, that and so much more
but as I write this I want to cry die and curl up on the floor

I'm so f**ked up, and you really don't deserve me
every time I realize this it's just so unnerving
I can't believe you've stuck by my side through it all
I f**ked things up so badly, this relationship I mauled

You're the best I could ever ask for
I've got a pain in my chest so sore
You're the best I could ever ask for
that Becky, and so so much more

I love you too much to ever think of letting you go
I love you so much I don't think you'll ever know
I just want you to be mine, mine forever and ever
I want you to be just fine, with you and me together

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  • 16 years ago

    by BrokenREALiTy

    I'm sorry Becky, for everything I've ever done
    I regret all that I've done times a million
    `Hm, I don't like how you use "done" again. It kind of took away from the lines emotions.

    I know I'm a f**k-up and bad boyfriend
    I know that I'm sorry and I will be to the end
    `I think "to" makes it slightly awkward--different word, maybe? I cringed at the choice of rhyme at first, but then I re-read it, and I like it. It works.

    I had it all and threw it away, I was so stupid
    I ruined what was perfect, and I pissed off cupid
    `That made me crack a smile. I love the use of rhyme. It's so simple; rarely used; but just brilliant in your piece.

    I can't believe I messed things up as badly as this
    I can't believe that I may never again feel your kiss
    `For some reason, that choice of rhyme is just too cliche and bugs me.

    this relationship I would never exchange it
    `That also sounds kind of awkward to me.

    You were the best I could ask for, that and so much more
    but as I write this I want to cry die and curl up on the floor
    `Aw, momentum just died. The second line is really clumsy, and I feel like you could've put it in other words.

    You used a LOT of the same words over and over again throughout the poem, and it really took away from the strengtho f the words. I loved the fact that the vocabulary was simple, but effective though. At times, the flow broke and it took a while to get back on its feet, but I did enjoy it. Just read over it, and edit it a bit and I know this'll be a piece worth the read.

    **I do hope things get better for you, btw.

    --..MiNDYY

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